As a young child my parents taught me to sit up straight, pull my shoulders back, act like a lady and most of all speak my words with kindness. Back in my formative years I didn’t exactly understand the importance of words and how they shape my thoughts and eventually create my reality. Today I see the exchange of words whether it is type or speech essential for living a more peaceful life. It didn’t come easy at first but in time I realized a key that unlocked what I call my secret to living a more peaceful life and it all begins with the awareness of language….
I was once the kind of woman who would pat herself on the back when something “good” happened and just the opposite when the outcome of a situation was less than expected. I was my own inner critic and would speak down to myself whenever possible. There were times when I would tell myself I wasn’t worth it, I was stupid and I wasn’t pretty enough to “make the cut”. Each time this happened I almost felt as though I had a mental hangover, I didn’t even want to think anymore because words and thoughts were so toxic. It is when I couldn’t control my thoughts with my mind anymore I decided to make some changes to the way I spoke to myself and in turn, I began to see my relationships with people take on a new nature of kindness and respect. Eventually, I learned all change and realization began within the landscape of my interior life, and from there it could flow out into daily life, relationships and conversations. I suppose it is this lesson I learned that ultimately ignited the passion within me for having more meaningful conversations with people. It is amazing what can happen when we speak words thoughtfully and with a sense of detailed awareness.
Awareness brings on a form of change whether it is mind discipline or a shift in behavior. Regardless, everything ends and begins with awareness. Instead of saying, “I don’t like” I began to say, “I don’t prefer”. Can you feel the shift just by changing one word? The word like is the opposite of dislike which carries heat with it. The word preference is light and soft with very little charge. It was with this one alteration in my language that shaped the way I speak and think today. I am here to tell you, it works and if you often feel like words are cutting and harsh search within your inner vocabulary for a new word and you will be amazed at how it will literally change your day. The dark cloud of negativity will be replaced with peaceful warm sunshine, no matter where you live.
As I began to see and feel the way I approached life and relationships with my new found awareness of my words my entire life changed and what flowed to me was nothing but goodness which is what I believe to be our true nature. Today, when having a conversation with someone I still my mind of chatter so I can be fully present and supportive. We must begin to honor our own words and the words of others with softness and kindness. Every word that is spoken is creating our day and our future. Let’s keep it peaceful, shall we?
Perhaps the most loving Valentine’s day gift we can gift anyone is a beautifully wrapped conversation in which every word and thought is honored and most of all, heard.