Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value. ~Albert Einstein
Writing is something I find healing as an adult. As a child it was an outlet for discovering my creativity. Yesterday I returned to Germany from the US where I finished and started a few projects that will lead me back to my home country several times this year. I had a wonderful time and learned so much about the place I’m at in my life. I was asked the question, “Why do you blog?” My response was, “because it makes me a better person”. With each post, title, and content I am creating myself over and over again. I initially started blogging to share my inspirations and ideas. My vision for this blog is somewhat different now, a shift has taken place so therefore The Little Room of Style will naturally shift as well. For me, writing makes me a better person and it is my belief the world needs more good people and valuable relationships that will shape the world to a more balanced and harmonic state. It is also my belief we don’t need more twitter followers, Facebook page likes, advertisers, and collaborations to make us good people. Who “likes” me does not determine who I am and it certainly does not make me better than another.
One thing I have noticed in my life since starting this blog is that relationships are not easy to establish. (Fasten your seatbelt because this is where the rubber hits the road) I participated in my first blogging workshop back in January of last year where I was told that being a “go getter” was the key to success. Whist I had my own definition of success and my own way of finding answers, some did not and I witnessed them soak this information up like a sponge to water. The world is saturated with the types of people we were encouraged to be and to be blunt, this is not helping the evolution of our society. My thought now is, what if we all choose to give our space, time, and support? Would this single action make a difference? The only way of creating relationships easily is being authentic and allowing them to come to me.
Other notes I took during my workshop were things like reach out to other bloggers, comment so that others see you comment and they will look at your blog. Introduce yourself and they will want to help you. When I heard these things I felt sick to my stomach. To this day, I believe information like this is harmful to fresh bloggers. There was not one mention of blogging with intention or authenticity. Before I knew what I know now I did these things and I am proud to say I learned a lot from it. For instance, one afternoon I got the courage to introduce myself through email to several bloggers I respected and one replied to me. I was asked to introduce myself at the next conference which was a few days away. So, I did just that. The conference came and I met the woman I was excited to meet. I stood in front of a blank stare and the words that came out of her mouth were “oh, nice to meet you…I have to go now, bye”. I thought to myself, what a beautiful lesson. I now no longer seek out people for support, I already have everything I need right here in this moment. When someone comes to me for support or a mentorship I don’t hesitate one second, if it feels right and I think I may be able to help someone I go for it. I don’t contemplate about how much time it will take away from my busy schedule. I simply make time. Helping others helps me and therefore makes me a better person.
Part of my recent trip to the states I was with my nieces where we visited the small village of Winter Park in Central Florida. It was a hot and steamy evening when the sun was just setting around six o’clock so the squirrels were out in full effect. I was able to capture my youngest niece, Sophia, allowing a squirrel to come to her so she could feed it a crumb she found in her bag. This is where photography is so profound for me, in an instant I was able to see so clearly my out-picture for the way my life is unfolding.The moments I captured below are the perfect metaphor for what I am expressing to you in this post. Sophia had genuine intentions, it came in the form of a crumb. Her authentic nature created a sense of allowance to the little fuzzy squirrel. He knew she wanted nothing but to feed him. Her intentions were true and pure and this is proven by the connection she had in the last image.
The world of blogging is a classroom of sorts. I have many teachers, they come in the form of bloggers, workshops, conferences, and brands. While some of the lessons have been outrageous to me, they have also led me to a place where I feel comfortable now. It is very easy to feel left out or not desirable but I have learned that this is all just part of the classroom. There are some “kids” on the “playground” that take all the toys for themselves, some that don’t share, and then those with open and kind hearts that know the meaning of the word grace. Each type of person is valuable for me for they teach me who I am and who I want to be. They are not bad or good, they are all just different.
I know I am not the only person who has experiences this. If you are one who has or if you are reading this and it relates to some aspect of your life please know you are not alone. The best lesson I have learned thus far is allowing people, brands, projects, and collaborations to come to me is a much more peaceful approach to life. My inner life reveals to me that I have everything I need right here, right now. I don’t need more of anything. With that said, when the relationships come to me, I know they are meant to for a reason. The reason? It’s simple, to make me a better person and to add value to my life.
My trip to the US was significant and full of the most amazing surprises and opportunities. More than ever I am a firm believer the “go get” approach is not one which works for me. However, what does work is allowing and trusting the journey. Trusting that everything based on truth is supported. Everything.
I wish you a day of heaven on earth,
When I was first introduced to this way of viewing relationships I intellectually understood it but practicing it was another story. I use the words below as a guide, perhaps they may be helpful if you would like to practice with me.
~Relationships that are allowed to come are the ones who make you a better person and add value to your life~ It is simple and in fact the total opposite of what some have told me. Since I have been practicing allowance I have had the most amazing opportunities arise and the friendships I have created have been ones that support me in my quest to be the best version of myself.